Allison Walter, Campus Protocol Officer

Imagine this—you’re sitting in a café in Saudi Arabia. When the server comes over to ask if you’re enjoying your coffee, you give him a thumbs-up because you’ve just taken a large sip. The next thing you know, the server becomes incensed and begins shouting at you angrily. What’s happened? You didn’t even open your mouth!

Like spoken language, body language, communication through voluntary or involuntary body movements, can differ between cultures. Simple gestures such as crossing your arms or giving the aforementioned thumbs-up can be interpreted in a myriad of ways. Being conscious of your body language is crucial to effective communication, not to mention making sure that you don’t have a glass of water thrown in your face unexpectedly.

Have you ever considered why someone may make huge hand gestures when she talks, while another keeps her hands clasped neatly in her lap? Or, when watching a father and his son, they make the same facial expression when they are surprised? That’s because body language is a combination of genetic and environmental factors. This is how we can account for body language variances between cultures. As we learn and grow, some gestures seem to come naturally, like smiling, but others we learn by watching the world around us. By observing the reactions of others to the gestures, we learn their meaning and their proper usage.

Do gestures have one absolute meaning? Usually not. The meaning of a gesture can vary based on context, just like spoken language. Take a common gesture, such as crossing your arms. This could mean that you are trying to unconsciously create a barrier between yourself and the person you are speaking to, you could be seriously pondering a question that was just posed, or maybe someone was overzealous with the air conditioning that day and your arms are cold. Because gestures can be ambiguous, it is important that you are aware of what you are doing with your body and the possible meanings it can have.

Conversely, learning possible meanings of different gestures can be advantageous when it comes to understanding what others are trying to communicate to you. Keeping in mind that gestures vary by region, here are a few general tips on how to ascertain someone’s feelings based on body language (from “Proxemically Speaking—Body Language in Interviews” by Julie Spencer).

Disbelief can be indicated by:
• An averted gaze;
• Touching the ear or scratching the chin;
• Eyestrain, itchiness;
• Wandering eyes, or eyes that stare away for an extended period.

Boredom can be indicated by:
• Head tilting to one side;
• Eyes looking straight at the speaker but becoming slightly unfocused.

Lying can be indicated by:
• Touching the face;
• Putting a hand over the mouth;
• Pulling at the ears;
• Scratching the nose;
• Casting eyes down, or looking downward to the left;
• Shifting in the seat;
• Wiping hands on trousers to get rid of sweat or fidgeting with hands.

Anxiety can be indicated by:
• Massaging temples;
• Different than normal breathing rates;
• Hunched shoulders;
• Nervous head movements.

So what if you’re traveling to a new place and you are unfamiliar with acceptable body language? Here are a few things you can do:

Do you homework. There are numerous reference books available to help you understand appropriate body language for the area you’re going to visit. “Kiss, Bow or Shake Hands” and the “Put Your Best Food Forward” series both list body language tips by country.

Observe your surroundings. While you’re out and about, take a look around. What do people do when they’re greeting someone or saying goodbye? How close do people stand next to each other? What kind of gestures are people making with their hands when they talk? Imitation may be the sincerest form of flattery, but in this case, it can be helpful in clearly and effectively expressing yourself.

Be flexible. Because body language differs from region to region, you may find that some things may make you uncomfortable. For instance, you may not be accustomed to the amount of affection shown between friends in certain countries (or, in some cases, lack of affection shown). Do your best to be understanding of these differences and act accordingly.
If all else fails, a warm apology always helps. It is impossible to avoid a gaffe every once in a while. When you do something that has clearly insulted someone else, be quick with a heartfelt apology. Explain that you did not understand that your action was offensive and that you will avoid it in the future. I find that people are usually able to forgive if they understand that you have good intentions.

Do you have a protocol question that you would like to see featured in the World of Protocol? Email us at int-eng-prot@illinois.edu.